Why Do So Many Teens Get Involved in Boy-Girl Relationships? (Part 10)

Let's move on to number 10 - They have a grotesque or personal reason. This reason is pretty interesting actually. Let's get into it.

Individuals are motivated to act by different things. These motivations would compel and influence us to act in a certain way. In the area of relationships, sometimes people have certain 'objectives' or 'personal reasons' and why they get into them. For example, maybe this guy has the objective of getting many girlfriends? Or it could be wanting to learn about human behavior? It could be many things. Often, it is just sick or unethical. However, there are times where both parties have similar personal reasons. Thus, the term 'fling' emerges.

He/she might even think of it as a game. A game that they actively engage in to have fun and enjoy each other's company. In cases like this, if one party does not share the reason, but rather is serious about the relationship, he/she would most definitely get hurt. When the truth unfolds, he/she would feel cheated. Thus the term "player" and the phrase, "I got played".

However, if both parties share the same reasons, I suppose they will just be a 'fling'. This would most probably not hurt them. But, it would most probably affect them in one way or another. I believe that individuals must be very careful as to not fall into this, unless they have the same objectives.

Life is a zoo in a jungle.

- Peter De Vries

take care,

~daN~

Life is a game, don't get played.

Why Do So Many Teens Get Involved in Boy-Girl Relationships? (Part 9)

Okay!! So we're on to part 9.. (I can't wait to move on to the next subject)... :)

The next reason is that they are looking for long-term commitment. But not marriage. In most cases, this is because they are serious... but they do not have marriage in mind at the moment. I believe that this is a really good reason for getting into a relationship. It is when he/she is really interested in a long-term relationship and not playing around. Relationships based on this reason would be good learning experiences. Many individuals, including me, have gone through these kind of relationships and come out with a good experience and something that they would never forget or/and regret.

This is a really simple reason because, most of the time, it turns out with good outcomes. Either they do get married in the end, or they both realize that they are not meant for each other and split with good memories and no regrets. However, there are always those cases where it ends badly. As they say, "The longer the relationship, the more painful it will feel when it ends". Or at least I say that. I believe that when nearing those situations, both parties should try their best to be as objective as they can about when handling it. Looking at it as a good learning experience rather then broken hearts would help. Life would never be the same if one goes through such long-term relationships. By long-term, I mean at least 1 plus years.

In the end, it is up to each individual on how they look at it. One can choose to be either positive, or negative. Choosing whether to be optimistic or not would alter results and emotions drastically. Relationships can be learning experiences. They are not everything. You won't die because of one. Take a deep breath, count to ten, and see that life can be beautiful without him/her. There's someone special out there for you. Just wait and see. ;)

"Happiness comes of the capacity to feel deeply, to enjoy simply, to think freely, to risk life, to be needed"

- Storm Jameson

take care,

~daN~

Why Do So Many Teens Get Involved in Boy-Girl Relationships? (Part 8)

Alright!! I'm back again!! So now on to reason number 8 - They want to 'dig' their BF/GF.

This reason is as simple as it sounds. This is when a someone is, as they say it, 'in it for the money'. Although is my sound really cheap, it happens more than we expect it to. Money is not everything, however, money is definitely a strong motivator. People do all kinds of 'unethical' things for the sake of money.

This subject is fairly sensitive among the 'higher community'. Often, one would find it hard to be a hundred percent sure that his/her partner doesn't love him/her for the money. Especially if the individual is very wealthy. In such situations, one has to be very careful as people are becoming better and better at acting and faking it. Often, only time would tell.

This might sound 'fake' and 'sinister'. However, in many cases, the one that got into the relationship for the money starts to fall for his/her 'mark'. This may happened due to a few reasons. Let's take it back to the start.

Why would one get into a relationship for the money in the first place? One of the main reasons is because he/she experienced little or no love when he/she was growing up. Thus, he/she would not know how it's like to truly love and be loved in return. When their 'mark' shows them real and true love, they might actually fall in love as well. Thus, they wouldn't be in it for the money, but instead, for love itself. Another reason is that he/she was hurt by a past relationship that left him/her scared. This might cause him/her to lose hope in 'love'. Thus, money becomes the motivation for relationships in place of love.

In spite of the reasons and causes above, I still believe that each individual is responsible for their own actions. One has no right to blame their actions on something else or on their past. In the end, it's the decisions we make that would decide our reality. Shit happens. It's not how much shit that matters, it's how we react to them that does.

"Happiness depends upon ourselves."

- Aristotle

take care,

~daN~

Why Do So Many Teens Get Involved in Boy-Girl Relationships? (Part 7b)

Wow. It has been ages since I last updated. Almost a year!! Ok, so one year and a new city later (I'm in Melbourne). I've definitely seen more and experienced more than before. So here we go on to Part 7b - They miss their past relationship and want to taste it again. Like a 'bounce back' or something to do with their ex. We split this reason into two parts. So we're on the second part - Revenge of some sort.

Okay, for example, guy breaks up with girl. Girl takes it really badly; however, the guy 'seems' to not be affected by what's happened. This happens in many cases because of the ego that all guys have. Guys don't want to look emotional or 'weak', especially in front of other guys. That's just the way it works. Thus, they put on a front and pretend to 'not care'. This causes many girls to think that their ex is 'heartless' and such. Generally, the girl would just be heartbroken and try to forget his ever existence. However, some individuals would want to take revenge. How would they do this? He/she would get into a relationship JUST to rub it in his/her ex's face. This is extremely spiteful and I totally despise people who do this.

So then a new relationship is formed. Just think about it. How would a relationship made and built on spite turn out? Obviously, it'll most probably end not too long after it starts. And like I've mentioned before, unless he/she finds another reason for the relationship instead of just 'getting back' at his/her ex, it would end badly. Even more so in this case, as the individual is really an ass to get into a relationship just to spite someone else. This might sound like, "Who would ever do this?" But trust me people, it happens. (I guess some people are just real asses)

Since the basic cause for this is often just a misunderstanding, what one should do is be direct and get everything out in the open. Assumptions are one of the worst enemies of relationships of all kinds. As they say, "To Assume is to make an ASS of U and ME". Thus, I would advice to just be bold and say what you have to say. Ask what you need to ask. That way, there would be minimal misunderstandings and life would be so much simpler, with less drama. Everybody hates drama.

"In taking revenge, a man is even with his enemy; but in passing over it, he is superior"

- Sir Francis Bacon

take care people,

~daN~